Posts Tagged ‘marriage’

Intercultural REAL Family Life Conference

Friday, April 30th, 2010

Power to Change presents: Intercultural REAL Family Life Conference

Come and hear experienced and engaging speakers, Phil & Lorrie Taylor, on marriage and parenting as just one piece that couples need to mature as leaders. This conference aims to improve good marriages of intercultural leaders, help mend marriages in difficulty, and introduce a good tool to the Christian intercultural community. We are inviting intercultural pastors, business/community leaders, and young adults leaders. See poster in foyer for more details.

Date: Sat, May 15, 2010
Location: Tenth Ave Church (11 West 10th Avenue, Vancouver, BC V5Y 1R5)

For more info, please contact John Driediger 604.613.4123.

How’s Your Marriage?

Sunday, June 28th, 2009

“Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; his greatness no one can fathom. One generation commends your works to another; they tell of your mighty acts. They celebrate your abundant goodness and joyfully sing of your righteousness.” Psalm 145:3-4,7

A woman bragged: “My husband and I have a very happy marriage. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for him, and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me—and that’s the way we go through life – doing nothing for each other.”

The comedian Rodney Dangerfield had some advice about marriage. He said, “We eat apart, we take separate vacations. We never see each other. We’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together!”
Marriage is a unique relationship that places special demands on us. As I have said on more than one occasion – marriages may be made in heaven, but they have to be lived out here on earth in the rough and tumble, grittiness of life. We need to understand that for a marriage to succeed and be happy and productive and fulfilling, it requires commitment and work.

At the age of 59, Robertson McQuilkin, president of Columbia Bible College and Seminary – now Columbia International University and Seminary in Columbia, South Carolina, thought that he could effectively lead the institution for at least another eight years. Then his wife, Muriel, was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease and it began to attack her mind with all of its terrible, disorienting, debilitating force. McQuilkin was immediately confronted with what he regarded as two divine callings – to be president of a great school that trained pastors and missionaries and lay people for ministry and to be the husband of Muriel. But he couldn’t do both.

He wrote these words: “When the time came the decision was firm. It took no great calculation. It was a matter of integrity. Had I not promised Muriel years before, “In sickness and in health…till death do us part”?” After the decision was made and he had resigned from his position at the college and seminary, McQuilkin expressed his feelings about his wife: “She is such a delight to me. I don’t have to care for her, I get to!”

My friends – marriage is hard work and a great marriage is even harder. There are so many things that conspire against us – beginning with our own selfish, sinful nature. But God reminds us through the church that we are not alone – we have God’s resources – the Spirit, the Scriptures, prayer, one another and always grace.

Now, let me ask you – how’s your marriage? How is your communication? Do you still work on your romance? Do you have a commitment to marriage mind set? Is your life and your marriage built on Christ and nourished in the church? These things can help strengthen your marriage.

It’s the Same with Love

Sunday, June 14th, 2009

“Lord, you have been our dwelling place throughout all generations. Before the mountains were born or you brought forth the whole world, from everlasting to everlasting you are God.” Psalm 90:1-2

The movie A Beautiful Mind tells the story of John Nash (played by Russell Crowe), who is a brilliant mathematician that struggles with mental instability. His marriage is a testimony of true love and commitment through years of trial, illness, and—finally—great success.

On the evening Nash proposes to his future wife, he shows up very late to the restaurant where he’s supposed to meet her to celebrate her birthday. Painfully embarrassed about his mistake, he manages to win back her affection. Then he awkwardly straightens his tie and drops to one knee to propose.

As a true scientist, he is uncertain how to justify making such a great commitment with evidence that is so difficult to measure. The following conversation convinces him that he’s found true love:

Nash: Alicia, does our relationship warrant long term commitment? I need some kind of proof, some kind of verifiable empirical data.

Alicia: [giggling at his awkwardness] Sorry, I’m just trying to get over my girlish notions of romance. Hmmm…proof…verifiable data…. Okay. How big is the universe?

Nash: Infinite

Alicia: How do you know?

Nash: I know because all the data indicates it’s infinite.

Alicia: But it hasn’t been proven yet.

Nash: No

Alicia: You haven’t seen it.

Nash: No

Alicia: How do you know for sure?

Nash: I don’t. I just believe it.

Alicia: It’s the same with love, I guess.

Marriage is a journey into the unknown. It begins and ends in love, commitment and trust. In between it is nourished by communication, sharing, humility and lots and lots of hard work. Long term marriages aren’t just luck. They are usually built on respect and love and commitment. It is this foundation that can make it easier to weather the storms and challenges of life that can tear at the fabric of a relationship. How is your marriage? Is it being nourished by respect, love and commitment?

Will You Wash My Dishes?

Sunday, May 17th, 2009

“How good it is to sing praises to our God, how pleasant and fitting to praise him! The Lord delights in those who are his, who put their hope in his unfailing love.” Psalm 147:1,11 (adapted)

Sometimes we get a distorted idea of what love is. One night, a man decided to show his wife how much he loved her. After dinner he began to recite romantic poetry, telling her he would climb high mountains to be near her, swim wide oceans, cross deserts in the burning heat of day, and even sit at her window and sing love songs to her in the moonlight.

After listening to him go on for some time about this immense love he had, she ended the conversation when she asked: “But will you wash the dishes for me?”

Real love is tangible, sacrificial, caring and shows itself in action. This is true of love in the family and in the family of God. It is easy for us to say that we are willing to do great things for God and yet neglect the concrete expressions of love and caring that the people around us need. Smiling, offering to sit with a sick friend, doing the grocery shopping for someone who can’t get out, calling someone who haven’t seen or heard from in a while to make sure that things are okay, the list goes on. As salt and light in the world and in the church we are to demonstrate our love in ways that meet needs, even if our actions don’t seem very grand or earth shaking. Whose dishes do you need to wash?

How’s Your Marriage?

Sunday, May 18th, 2008

Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.” (Romans 5:1-5)

Bruce Larson, in The One and Only You, illustrates the ease with which we can lose our passion, our zeal. He uses the common cold and a married couple as his principal point-makers.

The first year the husband says, “Sugar, I’m worried about my baby girl. You’ve got a bad sniffle. I want to put you in the hospital for a complete checkup. I know the food is lousy, but I’ve arranged for your meals to be sent up by one of the finest restaurants in town. It’s all arranged.”

The second year: “Listen, honey, I don’t like the sound of that cough. I’ve called Dr. Miller and he’s going to rush right over. Now will you go to bed like a good girl just for me, please?”

Third year: “Maybe you’d better lie down, honey. Nothing like a little rest if you’re feeling bad. I’ll bring you something to eat. Have we got any soup in the house?”

Fourth year: “Look, dear. Be sensible. After you’ve fed the kids and washed the dishes you’d better hit the sack.”

Fifth year: “Why don’t you take a couple of aspirin?”

Sixth year: “If you’d just gargle or something instead of sitting around barking like a seal.”

Seventh year: “For heaven’s sake, stop sneezing. What are you trying to do, give me pneumonia?”

Someone has said, “Marriages are not ruined by a blow out, but by a slow leak.” Most marriages are ruined by a lack of attention; by taking each other for granted. How is your marriage? Has it lost its freshness? Are you growing together or growing apart? Are you giving care and attention to your marriage? The choice is yours.